who is actually the innocent one?

Is afraid of animal. 

If you do not put the cat into that bloody cage;

I rather lock myself in the cage, as long as it can't reach me..

 Suspect found!! 

My housemate brought this kitten back without advance notice and permission from other housemates!

It caused inconvenient for us, and a lot of headache for me..

Okay, you might think it's fairly cruel to point all the blame on an innocent kitten like this;

but you would never have thought of any story behind it

It was actually a present from an admire of my housemate's boyfriend!

because the bf caught guilty to receive such a 'lovely' present from girls other than his gf

therefore, he accepted the gift and give it to her gf (smart huh?)

At first, my housemate (aka the boy's gf) knows nothing about the truth;

she received the gift with joys thinking that her boyfriend has just did the most romantic thing ever on her.

she was pleased, and bought a lot of stuffs for the cat: shelter, food and etc

One beautiful morning, I was studying in the living room and the door bell rings

I opened the door and a mature malay auntie yelled at me: "where's the cat?! where's the cat?"

I was quite shocked by the sudden visit (fyi, our condo does not allow pet in the house, unless we have gain special permission from the authority beforehand)

of course, to protect the house from getting trouble

I denied the fact that we had a kitten at the house and tried to ask the auntie who is she actually looking for;

she straight away made call in front of me and said, "is XXX at home"? 

my Goodness! that was exactly my housemate's name

I said to her that my housemate was not at home, she has gone for class, 

then only the auntie left our place without having the chance to meet my housemate and get back her kitty;

half an hour after, my housemate walked out from her room with her messy hair

"you were at home all this while"? "didn't you hear someone yelling at our doorstep this morning"?!

my goodness! she was actually at home and she do nothing but to let me handle all this shits of her by my own!

but maybe she has a deep sleep so she couldn't hear anything from outside. I forgive her

After awhile, she has got the triangle relationship figured out, between the admire, her bf and her, and the kitty

she was mad and asked for a broke up

after all, the kitten has returned to the owner..

and after awhile, they made up (STUPID @#$%@!!)

the end

If justice cannot punish you; i will let the karma do

WHAT THE HECK! I JUST GAVE RM1500 FOR A BITCH TO SPEND!!

It was my ever 1st time got cheated in a lame way, the lamest reason from the stupidest dumb!

"That's just too bad" The only valid reason she could give after spending my RM1500 for granted! And her arrogant face still vividly flashing in mind from time to time. If i could give her a slap, i will take anything to do it. seriously..

Ho Swee Kim! You're a law student yet you do not apply any single law into the real life!

Only now i know why you need to repeat your 1st year of degree again, because YOU HAVE NO LOGIC!

I couldn't get myself over from my mistakes and i am so so so depressed on it. I am so so so so frustrated with her and i was so so so upset with myself of being so stupid to be fooled by the stupidest girl in the world!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was an unexpected accident and whatever i can blame is of my bad luck, that's what everyone beside me has said.

"You can't do anything, it's a lesson for a good people like you". My friend said that to me. This has challenge my life motto. I thought it would be alright if i treat people with good intention; at least they will treat me as how i treated them. Now that it was proven wrong, and it's time for me to reflect and re-set my life motto; at least to eliminate this one.

"Why don't you try doing something instead of blaming yourselves?" I bet you will ask me with this question.

I have done whatever i can. I visited a counseling session and i have spent few months of my life asking for professional advices.

I have got all the procedure prepared and support from my lawyer-to-be friend (thank you Vincent for helping). "Wow, it was so complicated but I am sure you can get back your money." He assured me after he investigating on my case.

But after struggling for some times i decided not to lodge a report and sue her in a court.

First, is mainly because of my parents. They were so frustrated at first but then they asked me to let go. For them 1500 is nothing if comparing to my happiness and if it affect my studies then it will be not worth even i've asked back the money.

Second, I attended counseling for that (kindly noted that i am not suffering from any psychological disturbance for that; just that i am using my advantage being a psychology student to attend counseling for free). I shared my problems with the counselor and he asked me few questions in order to help me explore more deeply on the issue.

HIM: "So what you hope to get if you've ask back your money?"

ME: " I am not struggling with the money; just that i need justice, to prove that there is no wrong for good people".

HIM: "So what will you feel after striving for justice?"

ME: "At least I won't feel bad of what i have done, i still want to believe in myself."

HIM: " So even after you get the justice; aside feeling relief then what will you feel?"

ME: "... ..." (couldn't answer)

HIM: "Okay, let's change it this way, so what you feel when you face with this problem until you need to send her to court?"

ME: "That's my rights and she cheated my money in an illegal way!"

HIM: "So how you feel?"

ME: "I feel frustrated and upset"

HIM: "How about telling me about what you have felt on your own?"

ME: "... ..." (couldn't answer again)

He hang there waited for me to answer..

"I felt stupid..." Finally I said it with tears rolling in my eyes.

HIM:"Okay, let's talk about your family, so you have 5 siblings including you." "Do you mind to share some of you childhood memories?"

I was like what the heck? You dig the problems so deep until i even not aware of it then you leave me hang there with more problems.

Now i have gotten another stupid lesson because of the stupid thing.

"It's enough" I think God try to send me this message that is why i chose to let it go.

If justice cannot punish you; i will let the Karma do.

to be better

PART I:
*written on 3th November 2010*

Promised myself to leave perfection for one good reason - to be better

I spent a year and a half living in places like this 

for me it's not only a PLACE; but a PALACE

I fell in love with it at the first sight,

for the first time I saw it, I have already decided to live my life here

but seeing is actually deceiving; dreaming is only believing

sometimes, perfection is nothing better than just dreaming it

under some unavoidable circumstances,

finally I made my decision to leave

it took up a lot of excuses to convince myself,

that I can find a better life out there

I finally leave, with much pains and unwillingness 

__________________________________________________________________

PART II:

*updated on 1st September 2011*

My life was simpler and happier out there. 

Now that I've know my decision to leave was a right move.

As compare to a heaven without angels; 

I rather stay with angel anywhere outside the heaven

I found my angel

thanks for bringing lucks and much laughter to my life

Cheers! for life

人生

我放下了一切该有的“优势”,告别了“温暖”;

向“智慧”老爷打了一份工,

刻苦耐劳赚取了些“人生经验”,

从此也跟“烦恼”打上了交道；

无意间当上了“奢侈”的奴隶，

也陷下了“华丽”的圈套，

打上了“忧虑”；但心里只有“真诚”

the world i am in but never be mine

My second life start here living in Kuala Lumpur.

Studying in HELP University College is a great experience I ever had, standing on my foot. Staying far away from my home sweet home, I have to settle everything by myself; at the same time enjoy the most choosing what to eat and do whatever I love to.

Silly, recall back to the time when I was 16. When practicing for stage performance, a friend of mine proposed an idea that one old lady grocery shopping in Mid Valley (brings the meaning that the old lady is in the trends). At that time I was shocked, by her creative ideas as well as envy on her thinking that I might never even have a chance to do like the old lady.

Few years later, I am now enjoying grocery shopping in Mid Valley (because it is very near to the place I currently staying -Bangsar). And now I change my preference to Bangsar Shopping Center, it's much more nearer and nicer environment.

My place is 2 minutes away from Bangsar Shopping Center, 4 minutes to Bangsar Village, 5 minutes to Mid Valley, and 9 minutes to One Utama, Pavillion, KLCC, Time Square and Law Yat.

Can say that I shop every weeks, I just love to. Spending my money, enjoying my life here within my short 3 years Degree time.

Sharing a home with stranger is a great adventure. Although we all are students; but staying under the roof with different races and gender come from different countries produce sparks and sometime nearly got the whole house burned. Thanks to them, I experienced staying differently in heaven, hell and jungle by mere paying a rent for one house.

Story 1:

I had a vivid experience that a couple fighting in front of me with knife. Yes, a real knife, the knife that I always use to cut meat; and still using it until now (disgusting, rite?) =.=''

I remembered that time I was sitting in front of table memorizing the speech for tomorrow presentation. The couple had a loud fight in their room. After that, the girl rushed into the kitchen and picked a knife, to threaten the boy. With no brave standing the knife waving in front of him, the boy grabbed the knife over and straight pointing back to the girl. Girl sense the danger and slowly move behind to the living room where I am sitting.

At that time I supposing-ly have getting used to the verbal fighting; but the knife had shock me to the core! This is my first time seeing people holding a knife to cut HUMAN! But I was amazed by my calmness at that time. Tried standing in the middle without focusing how scary the knife would do to my precious life; I shouted on them begging them to calm down so that they can have their talks in sober. But no one listen to me even when I shouted.

No point, showed them the key, claiming that I am going to get the security guard so that they can settle it in police station. Now, this works. They stop fighting 'for a while' and the guys throw away his weapon, TO ME! OMG!! That was damn scary man! Yea, maybe he may not be aware which direction he is throwing the knife to, but hey!

After that, they both calm down. The guys was sitting on the couch regretting the terrible thing he had done. The girl cry like hell saying that even her parents never beat her like this before. I am crying too, for the worse experience they gave in of my life.

After a while, I called my mum seeking for some comfort. And my mum replied, you should have just hide in the room. THAT'S IT. I cry even louder after that.

One hour later I turned back to my room, passing their room I saw both of them hugging each other crying out their tears. DAMN IT. They fought, girl and me crying but only the girl get some comfort back. Okay, life isn't fair.

Story 2:

Now I learnt. Thinking that it is a brilliant idea to only recruit female house mates sharing a house with me, so to prevent any nonsense funny things to disturb my life again!

Everything seem perfect when I successfully get all the female staying with me. They are all look so lovely and I really wish to spend my time having fun staying together with them. But then they continuously bring my night mare back to the home.

Within one month time, one of my house mate 'met' a new boy friend here in this apartment (compare to me staying more than one year here getting bugs! but that is not my purpose, so I don't mind). Her bf is a senior manager in Mercedes Benz and now my house mate has her free Mercedes Benz driver send her to college everyday. But fortunately, she choose to has her sweet dream with the guy in his house instead of bringing him back.

But my another house mate bring her bf home and have sex here in the house. At least 2 times a day and normally after meal. Ask me why I am so clear about that? Oh please la, although their room door is shut tight, but they are extremely loud. Everyone in the house (and maybe even our neighbor can hear them). Damn embarrassing staying in the house la.

Taking up the role model as my 'parents', they give me free tutorial everyday educating me regarding sexual matter. Without watching porns or actively investigate the matter; I am already an expert in it, I clearly know the process, even the feeling without me to experience it myself. Seriously. And one more bonus, don't see the guys gentle behave to people; he is really wild in bed.

The surprising part is, her parents not even know she has a boy friend outside! Poor thing. Spend their full attention growing up a child for 20 years old but never get to share even a bit of their daughter's privacy.

But I take up lessons from them through indirect learning. I observe, 'being involve' as part of the incidents. However, I am glad I can learn a little from the lesson without paying much for it.

Story 3:

My same sex house mate is now testing up my 'sexual desire' or to see whether I have affection on human being or not. How said so? By claiming that she is open-minded and western educated. She always stand and talk in front of me, fully naked! Damn it, do you know how hard is it to talk to someone like them when they are naked? To show my respect, I stare only on her eyes without even dare to turn my eyes to somewhere else (trust me, it's real tiring).

And they have their culture to greet each other as fucker. Although I never greet her back with the f word but she is the one wake me up every morning with the f word. Yea, thanks to you I have my f day every day.

Story 4:

Okay, here come the bore part. It's about my life. I have no awesome extraordinary life style like them. Instead, I enjoy my healthy life.

Going to bed before 10pm and getting up early in the morning is part of my routine.

Eating breakfast is the best moment I enjoy the most. I heart FarmHouse milk, cereal, and pancake as my breakfast. And I eat more spaghetti than maggie mee. I learnt to make sandwich, soup, and prepare my lunch box, I add no sugar, salt and preservatives.

Oh! Yogurt fruit salad is always my favorite!

I enjoy sweating off in gym.

I love the way my instructors motivate me to achieve a higher stamina level, I love the way my personal trainer stare at me and congretz me losing some weight and look firmer now, I love the way I work hard with people together in a room with one same objective, enjoy our time stretching, dancing, kicking, jumping around in the room with pop music.

I heart Fitness First

I met a lot of Caucasian here. They are mostly passionate, friendly, respectfully, and gentle. I am total salute on their style of coping with problems. If allowed, I would like to learn up more from them. And maybe to convert myself into Christian. I found their food nice too! The cheesy creamy thingy.

Picture below was a sweet time spent with the passionate Switzerland family we met in our apartment.

Staying In KL making me so hard to resist myself from shopping. All the shopping mall are so close to me, and every time when I passing through the shopping mall is just like seeing them waving inviting me to pay them a visit.

I satisfy myself by spending a lot to dress up myself. I enjoy the success whenever people say: yVonne, you change a lot. you're prettier now!

For sure, I would like to thanks everyone, especially my house mate - Cindy Do.

She is very good in dressing up and I learn really a lot from her. Doesn't mean to imitate her style; but just fully convinced by her to buy the dresses she wearing. I would say that she had achieve the objective as a model. She make me wanted to buy the dresses that put on her so badly every time after she wear it, even the not-so-special looking one.

Cindy, you're a success. Please do not misunderstand me that I am a copy cat or a betrayal. I just improving myself by seeing you as a role model. Thanks for everything that you've inspired *hugs*

Admitting the truth that I am very materialistic; but well, I don't see the harm doing that. I do not commit myself in a crime or taking advantage of others just to fulfill my desire of buying.

I earned that much, I have that much and I spend that much. That's me, and I think I am enjoying it.

Agnes Bulu

My house maid Agnes Bulu is helpful yet a headache!

She brings us much laughter but still i need to complain!!

Today was a beautiful day. It is so rare for me to resist from good food. Instead of joining my family members for wedding dinner; i chose to spend my eating time to work out. My maid was pleased and she volunteered to cook me maggie mee. After ordering how and what to cook for my share. I sat there watching tv waiting for my meal to be served.

Quickly, she made it nicely and served in front of my eyes without me even moving my body. Then I spent half an hour finishing it. When i am about to finish she came and ask me nice or not. Then i replied: "yummy! i wish i could have another one!" Then she showed me a pack of seasoning and said: "but i forgot to put this one in". Straight away i fainted.. i speechless..

Is she being careless OR just me being stupid can't even know how to differentiate the taste?

THAT WAS JUST AN INCIDENT. I still got whole lots more to complain, so please bear with me..

First, I am so much confused by her vague identity.

Name:

When the date she entered our house, she wants us to call her Nissa. Few months after she added a sir name for herself and her name suddenly become Tanissa.

(p/s: she added Tan in front of her name, and that's my family sir name)

But when I checked on her passport, her name printed nicely Agnes Bulu; hence i call her Agnes, and guess what? she gave me the blur face, showing that she has no idea who Agnes is.

Religion

She looks small and black exactly like an African. The lame reason my mum gave for choosing her is because she is a Christian and my mum wants a maid who can cook and eat pork. But seem like she enjoy celebrating Chinese New Year more than Christmas. Again, i doubt she know what Christmas is.

Age

In her passport she reported 24 years old; but she then revealed that she is only 20 years old. What the heck?? And she act totally.. i mean totally.. like an immature child coming out from the jungle.

Remember that was once whole of my family went out for vacation. The moment when we reached home tiredly; she bounced from kitchen to living room and yield like she was in concert.

*ello? even if you want to express your excitement or welcome us from the bottom of your heart; can't you know it isn't appropriate because you're not behaving urself*

And i doubt whether she is a well trained house maid or not. Caz for me she is more likely to become our house mate than being a house maid.

Why said so??

First, she had clear record striving for her rights.

Afternoon nap

Well, you can said it's either inherited or our family is just a lazy bump; my whole family has the habit of taking afternoon nap. So here she is, whenever seeing us having our nap she definitely request to let her nap too.

*ello? my mum needs a maid; not another daughter*

And i think she is revenging on us for not allowing her for afternoon nap. Dunno why but she love cleaning the bathroom when i was in my nap. Or else she love to vacuum the room early in the morning and report false time so that we will jump out from our bed thinking we have slept overtime.

Well, you will definitely ask me to train her or whatsoever. I did told my mum and guess what my mum said. "She is just doing her work. You sleep whole day and night; how can she tolerate your timing?" Means what? for my mum what she have done is absolutely right! =.=''

Watching TV

Watching TV and laughing together is one of the family time we enjoy the most. Whenever we laugh jolly; she will start cleaning the windows in living room (caz from there she can get to watch tv too, smart, rite?). and even though she couldn't understand the language being spoken; she can laugh even louder than us. seriously

And when there is no one in the living room there's her golden chance to watch tv. Channel 108 (indian channel) is her favorite channel and she knows how to lower the volume so that she won't get caught. and even when she get caught she will stand there smiling stupidly at you. How can you scold??

And here some of her habits that make me.. uncomfortable.

Singing

I dunno how but seem like she get to know quite a lot of songs from her Indian tv channel and radio (my mum gave her a radio in her room). She especially loving Baby from Justin Bieber. And whenever i sing my song she will started to hum, whatever rhythm she like.

Washing

Not sure whether it's a good thing or not. She love washing, any cleaning stuff that has to do with water. We have a nice washing machine there but she still insist on hand washing before putting them into the machine. She has already spoil a lot of my Zara yet according to my mum. if i am still complaining she would let me wash the clothes by myself =/

Sigh! she has given me enough. Seeing others' maid being so helpful yet my maid is.. sigh!

But at least she is SOMEHOW cute. hmm.. like.. like.. Oh yea! she love chili sauce and maggie mee. Hell yea, she is quite easy to feed^^